Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
