Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
