i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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