i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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