I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
My ass is underappreciated
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
