Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
