is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
