I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
A bitchslap is in order.
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