in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
