Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
