I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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