love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
