Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
