Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
he puts the penis in happiness.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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