I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
