WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
