I bet he comes in French.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
