It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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