My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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