Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I think we might need a safe word for this...
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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