Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
