OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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