Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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