People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
