I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
