you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
