I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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