so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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