they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
