He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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