Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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