At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
