I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
kristin has been a bad kristin
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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