Already got asked if we're dating
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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