I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
