Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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