i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
