The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
