I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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