Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
home. puking in laundry basket.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
