the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
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