we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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