what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
