Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
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i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
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It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
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