There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
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this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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