If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
