If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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