While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
