Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
