yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
