I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Alive.
So much puke
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize