her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Be still, my beating vagina.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
this is an emotional support booty call
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
